lost in plans (then come lund)

i have been making and remaking a lot of plans in life, be they be work-related ones, long term career, or even minor plans for a long weekend, for a next solo trip away to the unfamiliar, or even more personal ones related to finding my right one and/or settling down. just this late afternoon, G buzzed me about the first round of release of notification of admission under studera. i checked and realized that another one (which i have started planning since last year, which i suspended since january in view of the interim period for university deliberations of requirements and qualifications, and which i thought i will only be able to get back to again after another week) will have to be integrated, finally but immediately, into the further making and remaking of plans for this year and possibly the two years to come.

which, after much thought, will suspend and prolong ideas of settling down with my right one. which also calls for a lot of contemplating about opportunities i may have to give up, and challenges i have to newly absorb.

lund came from a notification by studera that i have been admitted for a 2year masters programme in international human rights law. i still await for a direct correspondence from the university itself, but as it is, the ball has started rolling and with this new opportunity at hand, i have to move on with the preparations while thinking hard about more convoluted plans.

this did not make me cry. but there was this feeling, upon seeing the word ADMITTED in the studera letter notification, that something inside had opened, sending a thousand- and more swan origamis fly away... for a long moment, then only to be replaced by a boulder of frog eggs origamis, upon realizing that a lot more has to be done.

for now i will relish the swan origamis fly high, on them written prayers to reach god.

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